“Your life is a journey of learning to love yourself first, and then extending that love to others in every encounter.”
- Oprah Winfrey
I don’t want to tell this story. My breath catches as I picture you reading this, fifty years after it happened, even though I know it wasn’t my fault. How could it take me this long to find my voice? Until now, I could tell no one. Please forgive me.
My story may seem irrelevant, but stories can profoundly affect us and we may not even be aware of their hold on us. When we rewrite our own stories, the world around us shifts. It only took me a moment to decide to be silent, but it took me the rest of my life to uncover the layers of pain and fear I hid beneath. Some people may wish I had remained silent. But I have grown to the point where it is no longer my secret to keep. I ask for the courage to speak to you now so that we all can heal. Our culture, race, religion, or sexual orientation doesn’t matter. We are all connected. It’s my responsibility to heal myself so that I can serve humanity.
The time is now.
Please take my hand and walk with me. As the tears fall, hearts open and heal. It is worth the walk through my past to journey from Fear to Freedom. As I dragged my burdens and secrets through life alone, I slowly learned that these problems are universal, in all cultures and languages. Then I discovered that there are tools and resources to help. I offer these to you with love so that you can free yourself from fear, and enter your rightful bliss of Love and Freedom.
I’m not sure which tool will heal the hole in your heart, but I know that each one has worked for me in a unique and powerful way. I found that silently suffering alone keeps you stuck in the past. Once you change your mind, you change your life.
It’s time to let go.
It’s time to begin.
Join me as we share a journey from Fear to Freedom, where questions become a quest, and unexpected answers are revealed.
One day happiness arrived and I realized that I hadn’t conquered all my demons, but that I was standing in a clearing and felt more like a princess of serendipity than a victim. I peeked over my shoulder and could see all the mountains of fears I had climbed over and moved beyond. I looked down at my tool belt and noticed I’d acquired a lot of tools and knew how to use them, and I looked at my soul and realized that my spiritual muscles were looking pretty buff.
Somewhere on my journey I paused and bushed off my guide book and decided, maybe this has some merit for others that are going to be traveling this way too? I know that we are all finding our own way, and this book is here just to tell you about my journey: from Fear to Freedom. I share it in the spirit of adventure. We are all human beings becoming enlightened by our near brushes with the dragons along the way.
I have begun to realize that the fire breathing dragons were fears I had to face inside. I was afraid to speak up, and that dis-ease was showing up through weight gain and diabetes. I was afraid of being judged, so I stuffed my feelings, and put on a great act to make sure that I looked good. I was afraid of not being loved, so I shut down and didn’t share my real self with my mom, my husband, and probably everyone.
I didn’t get there overnight, and the healing shift has taken some time as well. This book documents my stories of how I was, what I did to disassemble what wasn’t working, and how I began rebuilding my life with my loving self in the lead.
I was a basket case in side. All the while, I was overcompensating for my not-good-enough program by being the school prefect, constantly studying, throwing perfect parties, and working ceaselessly to be perfect enough to receive the love I needed.
I used to be so afraid of being alone that I couldn’t go to the bathroom or go to sleep alone. It delayed my career as a Hypnotherapist, because I was so terrified that I couldn’t travel to any of my certification seminars, or sleep through the night when I finally arrived.
Along the way I began to listen to myself while I wrote out my angers and fears. The journaling became problem solving, and instantly released some of the energy and layers coving my inner glory. It took a long time for me to see glory instead of gory. Once I scrapped the layers away, I began to access my inner creativity and find the gifts of acceptance and bliss beneath the haze of depression and pretending.
My absolute favorite tool, Hypnosis has been my spiritual grace. It was the turning point for me to be able to peel away the layers of anger, resentment, guilt and fear. By finding the traumas, and going deeper into the blind spots that were hidden away, I began to be more loving and less judging.
Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) became my anywhere instant fix go-to tool. A few taps with that little hammer, and the monsters in my mind began to leave. It was all beginning to be a dream, and I realized that my thoughts were casting the characters and making up the scenes!
Chakra balancing was yet another planing, smoothing tool for emotional healing. It moves stuck cellular energy by aligning us with our authentic energy we came to be. Sort of like an energy body massage. So nurturing and loving.
So this is my Mapquest to show you where I was when I was stuck, and how I’ve gotten where I am today. It also shows you what I do when I fall into the dead end places, and what works for the long haul versus short term gratification of quick fixes.
Let’s be clear, we are here to help each other along. I have been blessed with many wise teachers, and I would never have gotten where I am without their kindness and patience. I honor their gifts as I share them with you.
My hope is that they will serve you as they have served me, and that together we will continue to heal as one sacred and deserving human family.
If you have gotten this far, this manual is your treasure map to freedom! I will show you the guideposts and the places to mine, and the ways to do it so that you hit gold and don’t waste a lot of time. It does not matter where you are or if you are like me. You are unique. This route to freedom is customized and created with you in mind, and you are the one who’s commitment and courage will carry you through to where our common Mother that loves us all equally, and sent us forth to be victorious is calling us home with great love and encouragement. We will learn together how to hear the inner voice of our intuitive greatness and harness our capacity for peace, despite appearances.
With Great Love,